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Masquerade
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| "Where Does the Good Go" - Tegan and Sara
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Trying to remember to post every day. Because otherwise, I kind of forget time is passing. My only other indication is the ever-increasing date when I take cake orders.
I'm pathetic sometimes.
--- 3751 | The mirror shows: Shine a Light   |
| Feeling much better today.
Yesterday I just felt overwhelmingly down. To the point where that cracked and showed through at work. I had to pause a couple of times in the midst of forming peanut squares to get a hold of myself and not cry. Just ..... really down.
Silver lining. It helped me bully myself into calling the counseling service during my lunch break - I talked to them as I walked around Wal-Mart's surrounding desert of abandoned mini-malls. This was the preliminary counseling session. We talked about what issues concerned me and past experiences with other counseling services.
They set up another phone appointment not this Thursday, but the Thursday after that ... but they want me to see a real doctor.
As they put it, there could be any a number of physical things causing what I feel - or it could be nothing at all. But we don't know until we find out.
But the idea absolutely terrifies me. Just. Made me cry the more I thought about it. Which just proves I'm messed up. I know that's not logical. The fact I'm acting so irrationally only frustrates me more.
But today? Today I feel much better. Slept well, and I feel more relaxed right now.
Well, relatively better anyway. I'll be able to keep a good mask up at work again.
I keep promising excerpts from my current 'soundtrack', don't I?
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--- 3751 | | The mirror shows: Shine a Light |
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Masquerade
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![[mood icon]](http://www.insanejournal.com/img/mood/lierre/compy/happy.gif){kind=small}
calm